For some reason the idea of playing a game of football on Thursday is stuck in my head.  The kids are completely psyched. Even Corey who is not a big football fan is gearing up.  Roy is usually game for anything that gets us moving, and my sister played intra-mural Rugby during college.  

There will be 14 of us here for Thanksgiving - my six guys and I, my inlaws, my nephew, one of my nieces, and then my sister, her boyfriend, and her little girl.  Even number - 7 on 7.  Not sure how the teams are going to stack up though.  My sister says her boyfriend is pretty athletic, so my suggestion is he and Roy against everyone else, but I’m sure that won’t fly. We’ll have to work it out.

Two years ago I had EVERYONE over.  My parents were here, and my mom being here brings its own brand of stress for me as I always want to impress her.  I break out all the big guns, and that year I ended up completely stressed out - I yelled at Roy and then broke one of my kitchen cabinets.  I scared my inlaws, who took Hayden and Dean outside to play.

That being said, the turkey was AMAZING!  Perfectly brined, perfectly cooked (Roy usually does the trussing up of the turkey), so at least there was that to show for my Thanksgiving meltdown.

This year, I’m going simple and traditional.  We are trying a new turkey brine (orange bourban), but Roy always help with that… so if it sucks, I figure I can quietly point the finger at him.  (I won’t really do that… but it IS an option!)  My sister called me up a few weeks ago and said she wanted to cook something, as opposed to just buying some dinner rolls and wine. 

Roy is a pretty good baker (he is the go to cookie guy in the house; cupcakes, cakes, pies = no problem; but I ALWAYS over cook cookies!) so he is doing his Apple Pie.  Corey wanted to do a trifle of some sort, so I asked if my sister wanted to do a pumpkin pie/cheesecake and she agreed.  Now, Pumpkin Cheesecake is my FAVORITE!  So the pressure is on her.

But then, of course, with all the excitement comes the bad news - since we are going to have a full house, I need to clean my house!

Now, let me assure you, we don’t live in squalor. We are not hoarders or anything like that.  I am just the type of mommy that gets tired of picking up the same toys 10 times a day, so it gets to the point where I just leave them and step over/around them as I go about my day.  Then comes Sunday, I yell at the boys to ‘pick up all the junk on my floor, or it’s going in the trash!’

So, this week I will pick up a little bit every day, but I look at it this way… everyone knows I have five boys, and two dogs… I do my best.

A good grilled cheese personifies comfort food to me.  But they always taste just a little bit better when Roy makes them for me.

From reading other blogs, magazine articles, etc., I’ve come to the conclusion that I’m a bad mommy.  Here’s why:

1. I use convenience foods - Honestly, sometimes homemade Mac and Cheese is NOT yummy!  AND if you want it to be yummy, you need to buy the ‘good’ cheeses, and guess what?  When you make enough mac and cheese using the ‘good’ cheeses for 7 people (two that are teenage boys, and one a grown man), it costs a pretty penny!  So, I use Kraft Mac and Cheese.  Sometimes I splurge and get Velveeta Mac and Cheese at Costco. During the school year, I try to have those premade PB&J sandwich things on hand just in case I oversleep, and the school lunch is nasty (Fish surprise, anyone? What’s in there anyway?) And of course, gotta have some frozen pizza on hand!
2. I curse in front of my kids - The older boys are 17 and 15, and I admit that I rarely feel the need to watch my mouth in front of them.  I am not a drunken sailor.  I don’t walk around shouting obscenities, but if I do something stupid, like drop a sharp knife right next to my foot, I might say, “S**T!” Because “Crap” and “Shoot” just don’t accurately convey the relief I feel at not having stabbed myself in the foot.  If I stub my toe, I might yell, “F**K!” Because “Gosh Darnit” does not properly convey the pain I feel, and Roy or one of the older boys is much more likely to run and see what the deal is if I yell a naughty word, thereby carrying me to the sofa. 
3. I have asked my kids “inappropriate questions” - By this I mean when they do something completely ridiculous, so out there, that I just have to ask. Example: Addi threw something at Dean’s face yesterday, right in front of me… I saw the whole thing, and when I asked why he did that, he tried to tell me he didn’t. I have asked them if they are dumb? SHAMEFUL, I KNOW!  I don’t just ask that and then sit there quietly when they give me blank looks, I ask them if they are dumb, wait a beat, and then tell them that I KNOW they are NOT dumb, so why are they acting dumb or doing dumb things.
4. I am not a member of the Nipple Nazis - After five boys, most people assume i am a die hard member.  I’m not.  If you don’t want to breast feed, that’s your business.  I’m not buying your formula, so do what you will.  I DO wonder though, if you can’t afford formula and use some sort of state assisted program, WHY you don’t nurse because it’s free.  BUT, I won’t come down on you for it, nor will I judge you for your choices.  Other members of the NIpple Nazis don’t get my mindset.  You go to ONE La Leche League meeting and… nevermind!
5. I let my kids watch TV and play Video Games - I like both, so who am I to say no.  And yes, sometimes they watch and play longer than they should.
6. I have tattoos - And you know what?  If my kids want them, I won’t say a thing.  I just hope they don’t get something dumb! And I’ve made sure they understand it is a permanent decision. Roy’s stance is that we will not pay for it. For them to really show they want it, they have to pay for it.
7. If my kids don’t go on the biggest, baddest roller coasters with me, I have a passing thought that they are wimps.
8. If they don’t try new foods, I also wonder the same thing… (see number 7)
9. I don’t immediately get up in arms if they bring home kids that are ‘less than desirable’ - I have coached teens; I have teens; I have subbed at high school; And I was once a teen. Sometimes ‘the bad kids’ merely need to know that there are adults out there that don’t immediately discount them.  Whether it’s because Mom and Dad have to work two jobs to make ends meet and can’t always be there, or maybe Mom and Dad aren’t there (for whatever reason), sometimes these ‘trouble makers’ are merely looking for an adult to give them some sort of acknowledgement.  I have enough faith in the way I raised the boys that IF they choose to befriend someone others deem less than, I will talk to them before I pass judgment.

All of this makes me a “bad mommy!” And you know what?  I’m okay with that.

As I mentioned a few weeks ago, we joined Golds Gym on Black Friday.  Serious about weight loss, Roy and I have been really good.  We go between 3-6 days a week, we have tried some new classes, we laugh, and we lift weights together.

For me, it is all about consistency, and having someone to work out with really helps.  Roy encourages me, makes me laugh, and makes working out bearable - dare I say even fun?  We took a class last Thursday, Body Pump - AMAZING workout!  But I don’t think my legs have ever been that sore.  I could barely walk down the stairs, even sitting down was rough, but happily I woke up this morning and feel almost normal.  Normal enough to hit the gym today, but sadly my honey is not feeling well, so I will either be going it alone or bringing one of the older boys.

I do find it frustrating though, the pounds seem to melt off Roy, and I count calories, carbs, etc. and workout hard, and I am just chugging along.  But, Roy is very supportive, and cheers all my victories - no matter how small.  We have been keeping food diaries for about a month (it will be one month on January 31st) and I have lost five pounds since I started recording everything I put in my mouth!  And, I’ll take that.  Five pounds in just over three weeks.  Slow but steady.

I have also adjusted the way I cook.  Cooking for me has usually been fun.  I enjoy cooking for a large family.  I like experimenting and trying new things, but with three growing boys it has been a challenge.  The boys are pretty active.  They are all growing, so cutting calories isn’t necessarily something they have to worry about.  On the other hand… Roy and I aren’t getting any younger.  For me, especially after five babies, losing weight has been a challenge.  I made up excuse after excuse to avoid the gym.  I told myself I would cut back on the sweets tomorrow as justification for eating one more Oreo, and the weight got comfortable, especially around my butt!

After deciding that we needed to get serious about watching what we eat, our health, etc., I set out on a mission.  I wanted to find healthy meals that EVERYONE could enjoy.  The boys still don’t need to watch their weight, but at the same time, why not teach them about healthy eating and how tasty it can be right from the get go?  And for the most part, they have been great.  Addi, Hayden, and Dean are too young to understand the hows and whys, but they have gamely tried the new recipes I have put on the table.  Joe is a bit more vocal in his critique.  He even said he enjoyed the “healthy” spaghetti sauce better than my usual.  Corey is very interested in food, so he has enjoyed looking through my new cookbooks, and finding recipes that would appeal to everyone.  I bought Rocco Dispirito’s book, Now Eat This, the other day, and I think I want to try everything in it!  Corey looked at it, and has decided he wants to make the revamped Philly Cheesesteak.  It’s great that the older boys are supportive or our decision to cook healthier meals.  I still buy them snacks, but I have found that every day that goes by it is easier for me to avoid snacking on them myself. 

I bought some dark chocolate candies for Roy and I, and I am learning to enjoy just one and really to savor it, rather than eating three or four.  I am learning to listen to my body and stop eating when I am full, even if we are out.  The other day, Roy, Dean and I went to Chili’s.  Normally, even though I might be full, I would try to eat just a few more bites since the food is often expensive, but this time I ate about half and I was full, so rather than try and finish it, we took it home, and I had the rest for dinner last night.

And it is working!  I don’t feel hungry all the time, I don’t feel restricted like I am sure some diets are, I am learning to enjoy the gym, and I feel better than I have in years.  I even worked up a little treat list for myself.  For every five pounds I lose, I get a treat.  I woke up this morning, and sure enough… five pounds are gone!  So, I went to Target and got myself a brand new Navy Blue sports tank.  The next treat I am looking forward to is a new pair of cross trainers… already have them picked out!

I’ve had five kids, that’s a fact of life.  It’s also a fact of life that I don’t have a personal trainer on speed dial, a personal chef and a nanny to help me lose the baby weight within 10 days of delivery.  And that’s ok.  I feel overweight sometimes, sure, and I know I should lose a few more pounds, but my boys are happy and healthy, and Roy and I enjoy a wonderful love life (though he might have a different opinion).

But then we decided to take a cruise this summer, and my vanity kicked in.  How I would love to lounge by the pool in a skimpy bikini, have Roy’s eyes pop out of his head when I walk out of the room in a tiny cocktail dress… vanity.  It isn’t easy with five boys that need all the calories growing boys do, because let’s face it, I sure as heck don’t need all those calories!  So I am faced with numerous challenges:

1) I want to lose weight, and I am no spring chicken.  At 36, I don’t feel old by any means, but the weight is not falling off like it used too.  I actually have to work now.

2) Roy needs to lower his cholesterol.  Okay, not a big deal.  The gym should help as we haven’t been as active as we could be for a while.  And I can switch up a few things in our diet.  For the most part, I cook pretty healthy, but our problem is portion control, so I need to monitor and be on the ball with that.

3) The kids don’t need to lose weight, so I am challenging myself to find healthy meals for Roy and I that have enough flavor to entice the kids.  Last night we hit a home run - Healthy Teriyaki Pork Stir Fry with brown rice.  The kids liked it, Roy and I liked it, and no one noticed that it was actually good for us!  SCORE!

4) Pushing myself to go to the gym.  I always feel great after a work out.  I love lifting weights and the feeling it gives me - that slight burn.  I love the sweat I work up on the treadmill, but getting out of the house isn’t always easy.  It’s cold, it’s raining, the laundry is piling up, or maybe i just want to watch some TV.  It’s a constant push to get out of the house, though once I do I am always glad I did.

Numerous challenges, BUT I’m not alone in this struggle.  Roy is right there with me, struggling to lose a few pounds, to lower his cholesterol, and to hit the gym.  It isn’t easy for me here though.  I know that men lose weight faster than women, and Roy is certainly no exception, but I am trying to focus on how I feel (so much better - less PMS!), how my jeans fit (looser, though I just bought them!), and how my arms and legs are already stronger.

And I was able to admit to myself that wearing a bikini is not necessarily something I care about anymore, not since I checked out the bathing suits at Saks’ website and fell in love with this hot little number by Badgley Mischka.  It’s a one piece, but I love it!  Maybe for me it’s more about having the option to wear a bikini and look the way I want to in it, than actually prancing around in one on the cruise.  Because, I simply can’t get that one from Saks out of my head…

Joe is almost 15, and he doesn’t like to cook, and honestly, I’m ok with that.  I enjoy cooking, Roy cooks occasionally, and so does Corey.  If Joe can help out in other ways, I’m cool with that.  Sure, a part of me worries that when he goes away to college, he will eat Ramen and microwaved burritos all the time, but I also know he is pretty smart, and he can figure it out if he wanted too.

Corey’s swim team has their first meet this Saturday.  It is something of a tradition to do a pasta party a few days before as sort of a team gathering.  Family is invited and the boys all enjoy going and seeing Corey’s friends - plus there is always a ton of cookies for the younger boys to gnaw on!  Roy is out of town, and I made plans to go to lunch with my mom yesterday.  I figure it would be a long day, but I enjoy seeing my mom and wanted to go, so I thought we would make the best of it.  Plus the younger boys could nap on the long car rides to and from my mom’s house.

I was heading home, and once Addi got home, he gave me a call.  He and I chatted and then I asked for Joe.

“Hey, Mom!” Joe got on the phone.

“Hey, how was school?” I asked him.

“Good.  Are you coming home?”

“I am.  I should be there in about 45 minutes barring traffic.  Can you get started on the Mac and Cheese?”

I usually try to do something homemade for the past party, but it was either Kraft mac and cheese (actually I think it is Costco brand) or a pit stop at KFC as there are only so many hours in the day.

“Ok, I guess…” he sounded unsure, and I smiled to myself.

“Go over to the pantry and get out three boxes from the big box on the shelf.”  I heard him shuffling around.

“Ok, got it.  What do I do now?”

“Get out my big pot.  NOT the skillet or my big red pot.”  I have a HUGE Le Creuset pot.  Honestly, I don’t even know how many quarts it is.  Let’s just say when it’s full of water I have been known to call Roy to empty it, and I don’t consider myself a weak woman.  Yes, it is that big - hence it is known as Mom’s big red pot.

“Ok, which one is that?” He asked me with confusion and frustration starting to creep into his voice.

Hmm…what do I tell him?  “Not the skillet, which is the pot with the long handles.”

“Do you mean the round one… god, I am so dumb at this stuff!”  He was mumbling to himself, and I smiled more.  My son is hardly dumb.  “Do you mean the one with the handles on each side?” 

He sounded so hopeful that I probably would have said yes even if that wasn’t the pot I was talking about, but it was, and he breathed a sigh of relief.

“Ok, I got it.” He told me he loved me, and we hung up.

About 10 minutes later he called back.

“Mom, how much stuff do I put in?”

“What stuff?”  I was confused as the directions are right on the box.  “Do you mean the butter and milk?”

“Yeah, it says 4 tablespoons of butter.  So, if I am making three boxes…”  He trailed off, and I was a bit surprised.  Joe is very good at math.  In fact, if Roy isn’t around, I will often ask him to help Addi as these “new ways” of doing elementary and middle school math sometimes give me a headache, and yet here he was confused about making adjustments about butter?

But then I realized it’s just because he didn’t want to disappoint me.  He knew I was counting on him because I was rushing around all day, and he wanted to get it right.  I told him the amounts of butter and milk he would need. 

“Ok, thanks, mom.  See you soon!”  We said good bye and hung up.

I pulled into the driveway about 25 minutes later.  Walking into the kitchen I saw Joe with his iPod on, singing, and stirring a big pot of mac and cheese.  He saw me walk in, Dean sleeping in my arms, and took off his ear phones.

“Hey, mom!”

“Hey!  You’re still in your (JROTC) uniform.” I was wondering why he hadn’t changed. 

“Yeah, I just wanted to make sure I did it all right.”  He said this as he passed me, running upstairs to change.  “I think I did it right, but can you check it?”

This was just a carton of boxed mac and cheese, something I could make in my sleep.  But I realized that he was proud of himself for getting it done, so I didn’t have to.  I assure Joe that is all cooking is.  Following the directions.  And as you go, you gain confidence (just like so many other things in life), and you make adjustments to suit your own tastes.

Ramen, microwaved burritos, and boxed mac and cheese - he might be ok in college.

I feel like a slug.  The past few weekends I have not done a lot of cooking.  Instead I took the easy way out and we did take out.  But more on that later.

Originally, my plan here was to have one of the boys cook each Friday.  But with school starting my plans often get messed up as I try to get everyone back on schedule, sign more syllabuses than I can count, and get used to getting up at the crack of dawn to make sandwiches.  So this whole week was a bit… off, if you will.

Even though school didn’t start until Wednesday, we couldn’t do our traditional back to school cookout the night before because Roy and Hayden had football practice!  So, we did it on Monday instead.  Roy did burgers on the grill, and we had a little accident (which is unusual for him!). We lost a burger!  Right through the grates into the hot coals!  We did try to save it with a rinse, but sadly none of the kids were interested in a soggy hamburger.  Kids… so picky!

On Wednesday, I did a Texas Chili in the crockpot.  Chili is big in our house, and normally we make it the traditional way.  2.5 pounds of ground beef, some tomatoes, beans, some seasonings, a little of this, a little of that… and in the crockpot it goes, but this time I decided to try something different-using cubed sirloin beef.  The recipe was simple-basically brown the beef in a pot after tossing it with a bit of brown sugar and salt… then throw everything in the crockpot.  This recipe actually called for 1 1/2 cups of chili powder!  I actually doubled this recipe to feed my crew, so the recipe is written for four using 3/4 cups.  This was from September’s issue of Food Network Magazine.  It was tasty, but it won’t replace my go to recipe anytime soon.

I think this is actually one question I get asked a lot-what’s dinnertime like at your house?  If everyone is home, I won’t lie… recipes need to be doubled, sometimes tripled to feed everyone, and no, I am not talking about huge portions either.  Roy and the boys are growing active boys-though I don’t think Roy is growing anymore, he is active- and they like to eat.  Though I try to use healthy ingredients and serve a vegetable at each dinner.  But over the years, I have learned to cut costs, stock up on meat at Costco, use coupons, and try to shop in season, but food is still our biggest expense.

Ok. I’ll save the tips and venting for later.  This was supposed to be about Dinner with the Crew.  Tonight I am making Roy’s favorite dish-we call it the Chicken Ring, which is actually a recipe from “The Pampered Chef” that I changed up a bit.  Basically, it is chicken salad (with some dried cranberries and walnuts) wrapped in crescent rolls that have been laid out in the shape of a wreath.  I serve it with corn and mashed potatoes, though tonight Roy wants homemade mashed potatoes, and since he offered to make them, who am I to argue!

Tomorrow, Corey is making a chicken stir fry, but more on that next Friday.

I thought that I would do this every Friday.  Cooking for a large family is fun, if not challenging, messy and expensive at times!  Sometimes, things are a big, old failure, and other times I really hit it out of the ball park.  Some days, I am just too lazy to do much, so we have ‘free for all days!’ And that is just as it sounds, whatever you can find is yours!  And once in awhile, we just pile everyone in the car, and head out to find something to eat.

Yesterday, Friday, we had errands to run, so we made plans to take Corey, Addi, Hayden and Dean to Pei Wei Asian Diner.  Roy has taken me there a few times, and I just love it!  It’s good, fresh tasting, reasonably priced Asian fast food.  It isn’t like your standard Chinese buffet (though we have one of those we really like as well!)-this is food made to order.  Generous portions, and good prices make this a new family favorite!  Roy got the same thing he always gets-Honey Seared Chicken.  I went for something new-Mongolian Beef (Really tasty!  The sauce had the right amount of sweetness, and there was a lot of beef!).  Corey was a bit adventurous and got the Japanese Chile Ramen (a little spicy, but he wolfed the entire bowl down!) and for the little guys we got the kid’s honey seared chicken, and Addi got the Chicken Lo Mein.  Along with drinks and a side of Edamame, we spent less than $45 dollars!  The food was filling, had generous amounts of veggies, and we got our choice of white or brown rice.  I highly recommend this place if you have one near you.

After lunch, we ran to Costco and don’t even get me started on how much we spend in that place!  We didn’t even get any electronics… just food!  (ok, I did get two magazines and some books for the younger boys) I won’t say how much we dropped, but let’s just say my car payment for the Prius is less….

Well, we picked up Joe, and the kids were getting hungry… again!  I won’t lie.  After running errands all day (finding Crocs for Dean was tough!), I didn’t feel like cooking.  I didn’t even feel like heating anything up… so we headed to Qdoba.  I love their Guacamole!  I got my usual Poblano Pesto Naked Burrito, with a side of Guac and chips.  Addi and Joe actually shared one of their new Nacho platters, and let me tell you… PLENTIFUL!  Even for the both of them!  Corey and Roy got the Signature Queso burritos, though Roy’s had chicken and Corey’s had beef.  Hayden had a taco kid’s meal and Dean had the chicken nachos kid’s meals.  Both the kid’s meals were very nice size portions, and I always leave their full.  We have their loyalty card, and that saved us about $7, or a free burrito!  We didn’t leave hungry and for a family of seven we spent less than $40… works for me!

I will be the first to admit that I am trying to save money these days, but once in awhile, I just don’t feel like cooking, so the kids get a treat.  Both of the places we visited yesterday are family friendly and very reasonable. 

Seven Thumbs Up!