Life with Boys
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I love to read, but I tend to stick with a few genres that I really enjoy - thrillers, mysteries, the occasional horror, romances if I want a light read, and, of course, Dr. Seuss.  But this year, I decided to branch out; to try different types of books, stories, and memoirs.

When I was given the chance to read The Rules of Inheritance by Claire Bidwell Smith, I jumped at the chance.  This fit right into my New Year’s Resolution of branching out in the world of writing.

The Rules of Inheritance is Claire’s chronicle of dealing with the grief of losing both of her parents to cancer before she turned 30.  There are moments in here of heart-wrenching reality, where the author is literally drowning in her grief, and here is where I had some trouble with the book.

It’s hard to criticize a book like this.  This isn’t a fictional account of a character’s loss, but rather a real person’s real story. So how do you take issue with what they write?

For me, my issues were actually resolved within the book.  Claire’s parents are actually both diagnosed with cancer when she is 14.  I can’t imagine what it must have been like at that age, watching your parents fight a disease that is too often insurmountable.  What I hated seeing was that Claire defined herself by the loss of her mother when she was 18.  She didn’t seem to remember the good times. She didn’t revel in the fact that she had 18 good years with a mother that adored her. Instead, she became the girl whose mother died when she was 18.  It was almost as if all that came before was lost.  Granted this is a memoir on dealing with grief, but it seemed that no matter what stage Claire was at she still thought of herself as “the girl whose mother died.”

No disrespect intended, but I enjoyed Claire’s story much more when she spoke about her father.  Her father made different choices than her mother.  Her mother chose risky surgeries as a way to try to fight her disease, but her father decided he would die on his terms, and spend some time at the end with his daughter. And I think those choices allowed Claire to finally see her father for what he was - a war hero, a pilot, a provider, a husband, and a father.  The best part of this book for me was Claire’s trip to the Czech Republic with her father.  Her father’s bomber was shot down over a tiny town in Prague during WWII.  Here she learned that her father was not just “dad,” but a true hero.  He fought bravely for what he believed in, and I think Claire carried that admiration over to her father’s fight with cancer.  She trusted him to know when enough was enough, and she did all she could for him in the end.  

I was happy to see Claire come to terms with the loss of her parents; pleased to see her move forward from “the girl who’s mother died” to a place of happiness and acceptance.  

Disclosure: This is a paid review of the book The Rules of Inheritance by Claire Bidwell Smith as part of the BlogHer Book Club. All opinions I express here are my own.

One of our favorite bands, Linkin Park, is getting active in the crusade to educate us all about breast cancer.  

Push Pink is just one more way to get the word out!

Thought I would give a shout out to the NFL. How cool is it that they do this during October?

Pink shoes, gloves, even the stripes on some teams pants… all in support of breast cancer research.

NFL Shop has some great things!  So, if you’re a football fan and buy gear to support your team, consider purchasing one of their special items. And don’t forget about their auction as well.

October is Breast Cancer Awareness Month.

Who doesn’t know this?  Last week the boys all wore pink ribbons to school to show that they are aware.  I was proud of them.  Joe left his on his sweatshirt and wears it to school most days now.  Hayden told me that it was for ladies that got sick in their breasts, and if I ever did, he would help daddy take care of me.

About eight years ago, Roy actually found a small lump in my breast.  He noticed it before I did, and I made an appointment with my OB.  She suggested I get it checked out just to be sure, and unfortunately, Roy had to be out of town when I had my mammogram.  Luckily it was nothing.  But I stood there in that cold room with my breast getting completely squished, and I prayed that it would be nothing.  I hoped it would be ok, because Roy wasn’t outside waiting for me.  I was fine, but it made me aware, and I make sure to check my breasts each month, and even though it’s no fun, I go in each year for my annual check up.

I urge everyone to watch Lifetime’s amazing movie, Five. It has five segments to it. Demi Moore, Jennifer Aniston, and Alicia Keys each directed one of them.  I laughed. I cried. But most of all, I got to thinking.  1 in 8 women will be diagnosed with breast cancer at some point in their lives.  That means in a room of eight women, one of us will have, has, or had breast cancer. It’s an eye opening thought.  

It seems like every company out there has an item that they create to donate the proceeds to breast cancer research. 

I will be buying a t-shirt this year from Ford Cares. To date Ford has donated over 110 million dollars to breast cancer research. Incredible.

Fright rags, one of my favorite websites to look for wild t-shirts for the boys, has one of my favorite t-shirts for Breast Cancer research.

And since I love lipstick, I will also be buying one of Estee Lauder’s special, limited edition pink lipsticks.

And while I have never worn New Balance, each year they come out with a new sneaker for “Lace Up for the Cure.”

1 in 8 women will be affected, but it will touch us all at some point.  Do what you can. There are so many ways to help!

I won’t deny that the Susan G. Komen Foundation has raised a lot of money,  but it would seem they are also SPENDING a lot of money, not on breast cancer research, but on bullying smaller charities.

The Komen Foundation says that smaller charities shouldn’t use “for a cure” in the name of their charity as it might confuse people.  I don’t know about you, but when I donate money to a cause, I make sure I know what cause to which I am donating!  I mean, are their a lot of people out there that give a more significant amount (and by that I mean more than $20) to a cause and NOT know what it is for?  Really?  Are there?  Hold up your hands!

Anyways, one of my goals for this year was to walk in the 3 day walk “for a cure”.  I had planned on talking my two oldest boys into doing it with me and thought we could raise the money together, and in the end it would be a memory we would have for the rest of our lives.  However, after seeing how petty the Komen Foundation is over the use of a simple phrase, I think my time, money, and efforts will be put to a different cause.

It should be about finding a cure for a disease that has touched us all in some way, not trademarking your phrase!

What’s more important? A cure or a trademark?






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I hope to keep this updated as I select the next book to enjoy!


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